The Saviors of Trem-NA Anniversary Event: Deleted Scenes

Not every scene you write goes into your book. Some are scrapped while others are changed completely while keeping some elements. Below I will be sharing summaries of scenes through The Saviors of Trem-NA that didn’t meet the cut or where changed dramatically. I will try to go in chronological order of the events in the book.


Chapter 19

In this chapter Rajax accompanies Whitney, Matthew, and Austin to the conference discussing if Earth will lend aid to Trem-NA. Before the conference begins Rajax meets Chancellor Weber from Germany and they have a polite conversation. Director Parkson interjects and subtly threatens Whitney and accuses Rajax that his focus is in the wrong place.

Rajax is sure in his desire to save his planet, but does it hurt to get attached to others along the way? This is the question Rajax struggles with in the scene. Austin finds him later and they have a brief discussion on the subject.

When this scene first came to light it was in a very cheesy way. Rajax asked Austin about love and how it felt and what to do about it. The cliché cheesy love story is not something I like to write. I didn’t like the use of the word ‘love’ in this scene, as Rajax and Whitney are still getting to know one another even if their connection is growing.

Attachments was the better way to go, as we can be attached to friends or people without that romantic bond. The final scene that made it into the book flows much better than its first incarnation.

Chapter 28

In this chapter our heroes get to board NOVA and start the trek to Trem-NA. We finally get to see what the spaceship looks like and understand some of its features. Whitney and Rajax meet Captain Briers of NOVA and Bykov who is in charge of the Russia team. We also find out from Evans that Bykov and his men are running the place and have made some drastic changes. This doesn’t go over well with Whitney who is already struggling with the idea that some of Director Parkson’s followers are on board.

At first I had Rajax and Whitney running around the ship before they got to the bridge. All the information they find out from Evans was originally like a bread crumb trail through the ship. It was not great. They were running around all over the place and the pacing was clunky and confusing.

In the end I decided to have Evans tell them what’s going on and address the other issues in later chapters. (i.e. the small living arrangements). It made perfect to do it that way instead of having my characters run all over the place. NOVA is about to take off and they have stuff to do.

Chapter 39

The Naanans have accepted NOVA’s help in vanquishing the Xeno and are preparing for their final stand. However, not everyone is on board with the idea of working with the humans. Tressam is pushing the last of NOVA’s crew to the edge sending many of them to the hospital wing. She claims they are weak, but Rajax knows it’s deeper than that. He confronts her in a one-on-one private brawl where they hash out new emotions and their long forgotten old flame.

This scene is one of the most drastically different ones from its beginning to its final interpretation. In the beginning I had Whitney as the one that confronted Tressam about her unwillingness to work with them. Whitney and Tressam hashed it out in a one-on-one brawl in front of the NOVA crew and the remaining Naanans. During the fight Whitney came out as the victor and instead of humiliating Tressam, offered her a hand in friendship.

While this would have been a cool scene, it didn’t fit the characters. The more I looked at it the more I thought it would be interpreted as two women fighting over a man. That is neither Whitney or Tressam. The more Tressam grew as a side character the more her hate became apparent. She’s spent her whole life trying to keep the last of her people safe just for these aliens to come in and sweep that victory out from under her. To make matters worse they are being led by someone she cared for and thought was dead. The brutal commander she followed was now a level-headed kinder man. Tressam isn’t mad at Whitney, she’d angry at Rajax.

The only logical choice was to have Rajax and Tressam hash it out. They would want to handle the matter privately so the idea of having an audience disappeared. This is one of my favorite scenes in the book. You can see where each character is coming from with their frustration and hurt feelings. Also I love that Rajax reveals that he remembers all the lives he’s taken, Xeno and Naanan. It makes you think how dangerous Rajax could really be (given the fact we’ve seen him lose control on a small scale a few times already).

For me this scene became a pivotal point for both Tressam and Rajax. Rajax has learned to live with his actions and chooses to be better. Tressam comes to grips that their relationship will never be the same.

Chapter 40

This chapter begins with Rajax waking up and preparing for their departure to free his people.

Originally I had at the end of chapter 39 that Rajax and Whitney spent the night together in his room (there was no funny business) after walking around the city. Then chapter 40 would begin with them both getting ready and setting out to free Trem-NA. While I liked that the scene focused on both of them enjoying their last moments of peace together, I felt it took away from their moment back in chapter 38 when they shared their first kiss (also one of my favorite scenes).

Instead I skipped to the daytime and added the moment Rajax shares with Austin, Matthew, and Whitney when he thanks them for all sacrifices they’ve made.

Chapter 43

Here we are, the finale. Rajax finally comes face to face with the Xeno Queen. Whitney has been taken and he’s done losing what he loves. The Xeno Queen plays with his mind, almost kills Whitney, and unleashes her hoard on the remaining NOVA and Naanan soldiers below.

The climax is the hardest thing to write in a book. This is where all your building up comes into play. Are you going to give your characters a happy ending or a devastating one? For this chapter I wrote about four different scenarios that could happen. They all had the same elements: Rajax and the Xeno Queen talking, Whitney getting stabbed, the Xeno hoard streaming out of the hive. What I struggled with was how I wanted the events to unfold.

I knew that I wanted the Xeno Queen to have more dimension instead of being a flat-faced evil villain. She’s crafty, fueled by a desire to make sure her kind is never abused again. Has she gone too far? Yeah, I’d say so. But there are parallels in her story and Rajax’s. In a way, Rajax could end up just like her. She’s toyed with his mind and heart, ready to strike and take him back. The Xeno Queen isn’t stupid. She’s prepared for this resistance. She has thousands of years of experience. But what makes this assault different?

Rajax. Rajax makes it different. His desire and strength is one she hasn’t seen in years. She covets his resilience to exploit for her own gain. She’ll do anything to get it back.

Enter Whitney. The Xeno Queen is using her for information and to get Rajax back. Having a tendril shoot through your chest would do the trick. Rajax believes Whitney is dead until he feels her breath on his face. Originally I was going to have Whitney whisper words of encouragement to him, but that wasn’t going to work. This was Rajax’s moment. (Plus I don’t think you’d do much talking after your chest has been punctured).

After one final battle Rajax comes out on top, becoming one of the saviors of Trem-NA.

I hope you enjoyed some insights to the thoughts and changes that happened throughout The Saviors of Trem-NA. Looking back has been fun, and I’m happy I went with what came out in the final product.

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